"Like as the hart desireth the water-brooks".

I'm sure there will be similar posts by the end of the week, but I can't go to church around Easter without going over Jesus Christ Superstar (one of the only Andrew Lloyd Weber musicals I really like) and Godspell, that crazy, horrible, pathetically executed musical I preformed a few years ago.


My Easter my isn't made of peeps and chocolate. It's made of going to church for each holy day, reciting passages with hundreds of people (like a play), and singing the saddest, then happiest, music. Every piece in minor chords, then Easter happens, there's a rebirth, and the music is in major chords.


There's something special, though, about memorizing four-part-harmonies in Latin. When all the notes are together, when a chord resolves, when the sopranos actually hit that high G. It's like Fuerzebruta, when there's a ceiling of water and plastic. But this time, you're in that bubble, and there's something beautiful about it.


Now, there is much stac-work to be done, much research to do, and much pokemon to be played.

fishtank.

Weather: Tsunami.


Today starts spring drawer cleaning. At the beginning of every season (alas, we've skipped some) each kid in my family, with help from mom, goes through the drawers to take out clothes that haven't been worn or are too worn. Anything with holes in it, any bad gifts from birthdays and holidays. They all get sorted into bags and donated.


Writing this entry is also procrastination.


Listening to Plastic Beach, getting stuck on Superfast Jellyfish. Gorillaz reminds me that I'can listen to rap without imploding.


I've been looking up Pratt housing, and I'm able to keep fish.

Broken Bride, Part IV, over and over again.

Drawings from stac, college holes and pitfalls, space metaphors, psychology, and the importance of hard-learned confidence.


First, the drawings. I used a pen and oil pastels to cartoon Juliana, Nikki, and Ashley. Not flattering, but I like the colors. I'm not developing that to answer why I like the colors. And each one has a longer-than-normal nose.

College results: Yes from Pratt, No from CalArts. I think I'm going to Pratt. I don't like not making decisions, and I don't like chance and 'leaving things to god' and uncertainty. But there is certainty, now, isn't there?
     How can you be sad when you shot your rocket to Pluto and hit Ceres? You're still got past Mars, and a hell of a distance away from Earth. That's a great accomplishment.
     Mere Exposure Effect: the more you see and think about something, the more you warm up to it. I don't want to have to warm up to it. I'm not used to... I don't know... I'm not sure... I'm not comfortable... I just want to...
     And thus, I catch myself in a pitfall. You hope for 150%, get 110%, but in reality, on Earth, there isn't anything better than 100%, and it's an achievement just to get to that.


In the end, I've seriously developed as an artist in the last year. I've gone to figure drawing classes, I've gotten more comfortable with being by myself in the city, I have no problem keeping a sketchbook.


So I guess I'm sort of back where I started. First long-term goal was STAC. That took a few years. Next, CalArts. That was a year, at least. I think I'll apply as graduate student later in life. So, here comes a time when I need to figure things out.


Back to the beginning.


A1-bqx is a blog established in the middle of my junior year of high school, back in February of 2009. Since then, it has been through makeovers and fast times and slow times. But I'll keep it going.

Well, silence is a bore.

I got into Pratt today. And I got uncomfortable when everybody shouted it out. I think I blushed. I'm not really used to that much attention (see the last 15-or-so comment-less posts).


Other than that, I've been itching to start my STAC work. I made a list, and I have some ideas on how to go about it all. The only thing is that I am expecting to hear from CalArts by the end of the week, at least. Then, a lot of my waiting will be over, and I feel like I know what I'm doing.


Case: My expressionist charcoal self-portrait is basically about being chosen, and only my bad parts being seen by the eye of the colleges. I hope to show some progression.


There are a lot of people protesting the amount of work. I can't offer any consolation, I love being busy. And reflective essays, plays, scripts, movies, portfolios, however people want to do things, are not the hardest thing to do.

Putting a paper online. - . . - . . - (interesting verbal cadence.)

I added my Character Study of Woody from Toy Story 2 (there is a difference in character development between the movies) as a page of A1-bqx. I think it's pretty good. It has a ton of large ideas, theories, and a considerable lack of scientific evidence. But there are always things I could do better, but that's not important.

http://a1-bqx.blogspot.com/p/sheriff-woody-character-study.html

cake art

Today, I saw my CAROUSEL logo... on a cake at the cast party. It was the most amazing thing. My art was copied... like Starry Night, or The Scream, or Sunday in the Park with George. I'm still amazed. Someone send me a picture, I need to post it.

Carousel, psychology

I have a lot of reading to catch up on.


Carousel is over and I haven't cried. I don't think I will. It's an art piece, and it's completed, and now I'm going to move to another art piece. Shouldn't it bother me? I don't know. Carousel is definitely not my last show ever, it's just the last show at this venue. There will be more.


I've been really excited about psychology lately. We have to write a paper analyzing the personality of a movie or book character. I'm analyzing Sheriff Woody from Toy Story 2 with Freud's psychoanalysis theories and C.G. Jung's personality classifications. It's so interesting to read how different psychologists think about personality and the way people are.


Some doodles from art class. Very... black and white line drawing.

a calm off period.

I have 15 minutes left of an off period, and I'm realizing that the blog is falling into ruin. I've been extremely busy, and I've been waiting to hear from colleges. Especially CalArts. Things are coming to an end, and I'm moving on, but I want to keep going with this blog. A1-bqx. The name of a box from UPS.

I've been working on a sea monster painting. It's totally expressionist, except for the color choices (which are decently straightforward, when compared with pointillism's contrasting colors and detail). The peace is simple: a great sea-dragon, towering over a small steamship. The lighting isn't 100%, but I liked painting. I'll bring in a camera one day.

So far, the accepted portfolios for CalArts look really similar. A little pastel for color, exaggirated proportions, months or years of experience drawing from a model. I need to go back to the figure drawing classes. I miss drawing life. I don't want to draw sea monsters or sunsets or paint years of wear on a stage-bench.

I also don't want to lose myself in the realm of abstract expressionism. I'll go crazy. Yesterday, we did the charcoal abstract expressionist exercise in STAC, and it makes too much sense to me. You cannot turn words around the same idea, to see it in a different light. I can't, I don't know how other people think around issues or problems. It's much easier (and scarier) to turn a picture upside down, and look at things in a different perspective.

I hope I'm going to California next year. I know what I want to do, I know where I want to do it, but the latter decision is not totally made by me.


Totally. In total. Awesome. Full of awe. Terrible. Terrifying. Why aren't these words used correctly anymore?


Off to class.